Warning: Post Contains Rant About Rejection from a Pro. Fiction Mag.

So, to the left you will see a recent rejection slip from Realms of Fantasy Magazine, one of the top professional markets in the speculative fiction genre.

Now, don't get me wrong, these poor editors have a lot on their plate, I'm sure. However ... HOWEVER, this has got to be the most insulting slip of paper I've gotten in the mail in a long time. I'm including those fake checks that lenders send you that look just like a real check made out in your name for thousand of dollars that say on the back "By signing this you are agreeing to pay back all this money at 500% interest and hand over your cats, too. Both of them."

Those are pretty low, but check out what this form letter says:

We regret that we cannot reply individually to each writer, but the most common reasons for rejection are:

• An old idea
• Unfamiliarity with the rules of grammar and/or composition
• and, most commonly, a story which simply did not "stand out"

You story may or may not have fallen into one of these categories. {emphasis mine}

OK, one expects that a huge magazine like this gets a zillion and a half submission per hour. Very likely a new mathematical formula had to be invented in order to figure out the precise speed at which manuscripts flood their mailboxes, but a simple note that says, "Sorry we couldn't use this at this time," would suffice I think. By implication of this blue slip, either my idea is trite, my grammar is poor, or ... just .. you know ... it sucked. Or perhaps, the caveat goes, it wasn't any of those things. Who knows, we didn't read it. And it ends with a knife-twisting, and I must say ironic, "Sincerely."

My Suggestion

You know what they should institute? And I can't imagine this would take any longer than it currently does to reply. They should just have small slips of paper printed with numbers with check mark boxes next to them. Each number indicates how many pages (or paragraphs) the
person reading the manuscript got through before they tossed it back in its SASE and sent it home. Just add the "We're sorry ... " line to the bottom and you have a useful, easy system that doesn't insult anyone and can actually help the writer understand what the publication might want.

Just my two cents.

Good night.